Saturday, December 1, 2007

Gianni, You Don't Want to Read This

Whelp. This post is going around my knitting/blogging friends so here goes:

Post 8 gross things about yourself.

1. My mom was giving my sister and me a bath and she pooped in the bathtub.

2. The sound of puking or even talking about it almost makes me puke. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Last year at Christmas dinner we used the new gravy boat - a chicken with a hole in its mouth for the gravy to come out. The family thought it was HILARIOUS to pour gravy on their turkey while making puking noises. I came very close to puking that day.

3. I was driving to work one day, stopped to pay my pager bill (loong time ago) and didn't feel so good. I had been taking vitamins that made me a bit nauseous and thought I had eaten enough. Well, no. I opened the car door and puked. But it doesn't stop there. The vitamins also had an unpleasant intestinal effect... For every action there is an equal but opposite reaction.

4. I can and will put my foot in my mouth. Literally.

5. I am a reformed picker and loved to analyze the catch. (Now my complexion is clearer. That was a long lesson to learn.) There are still classic, memorable moments that bring back a sense of achievement.

6. The smell of cows takes me back home. We didn't have cows but we drove through the Snohomish Valley nearly every day when I was little. Filled with cows and fertilizing sprays - "poop sprayers" as my dad called them.

7. I kiss my dog and well, every now and then she licks the back of my teeth. Horrible.

8. I slept in the lower bunk of the trundle bed my sister and I shared. One night she puked over the side of her bed which was directly on me. Mom came in and cleaned everything up, took care of my sister and I didn't even wake up! Next day at school I rubbed the back of my neck and couldn't figure out why it was kind of slick.

Who I tag: If you're reading this and any of the other gross posts and haven't been tagged, consider this your tag! Come out of lurkdom and share!

8 comments:

Gianni said...

1. I've gotten good at giving myself stitches...and taking them out...lets just say I have had lots of practice.

2. I know what several of my bones look like...first hand knowledge.

3. If I get something stuck in my teeth...I almost always "smell" it. Ewwww!!!!

4. I seem to have long conversations about poop...you know viscosity, texture, color, how satisfying it was.

5. My friends take self portraits sitting on the toilet with camera phones and send the pics to each other...I get about 3 a week...no nudity and no photos of the "work"...just a guy sitting on the toilet.

Ursula should have written this for me...I bet she knows more of mine than I do!

ANA BANANA said...

FIRST off, it was I who pooped in the bathtub with Jess. And second off, Dad calls them "poop squirters."

Oh yea...third off, I can stick my foot in my mouth literally also. Do you remember when I showed you and Jess in the hotel room in Vegas? After we had walked around the strip and I had flip-flops on? THAT'S HARDCORE!

Ana is my hero said...

Cheers, Kiddles. Let me just say, for the record, that I wasn't actually in the tub when Ana floated that infamous turd; I was merely standing in the bathroom waiting for the tub to fill up. Apparently Ana couldn't wait, and as I recall there was only a few inches of water in the tub at the time.

In her defense, yes, there was a toilet an arm's length away, but given the choice and capability, wouldn't you drop a deuce in a tub of warm water?

Mom said...

Urs, what happened to your blog? Isn't this supposed to be about knitting or the like?

This blog has really gone downhill quickly...

dad said...

Ah, Ursula, it was poop squirters.

Peggy said...

Aunt Peggy says, UR I'm horrified!!! LOL

Peggy said...

Aunt Peggy says, UR I'm horrified!!! LOL

Ursula said...

Huh. The only one missing is FR. Where you at!?